Feels no more.

Assalamualaikum...

Now, I feel less, I remember less.. or maybe because it hurts less. It's not that I don't feel, I don't miss or I don't remember at all.. but it's just that I think that I will feel less hurt if I try to forget. Try to lose hope. Tired. Tired of being unsure. Tired of waiting. Tired of remembering, reminiscing. Tired of everything.

No word can actually describe this feeling.

Nothing can really describe things that happen.

It makes me less understand.

It makes me lose.

Lose to the loose end.

Just a year.

Then I will go.

Maybe far away.

Because my heart can no longer take it.

I thought that I won't give up.

But, it gives up.

My heart...

Gives up.

Like stop beating.

It stops pounding,

trying,

feeling.

It just wants to stop..

because it can no longer take it.

Maybe it hurts too much

until it feels no more.

Love no more to a man.

To any other man.

It feels no more.

For that I'm sorry.

For kindness, I'm sorry.

It just feels no more.

No more to a man.

To any other man.

If,

and only if,

I can really forget..

I want to do it.

I want to erase the memory.

Because it suddenly hurts again...

Too much.

It just wants to give up.

And then to feel less.

It feels less...

And then it feels no more~